Wednesday, March 9, 2016

The yarn cat...I mean dog...

I recently took a trip to Chapters with my lovely 6-year old daughter. The ensuing conversation can be summarized as follows:

Isla: Mommy, remember at Christmas when Grandma said: "Isla what do you have there from Santa? And I said a sketch book. And Grandma was like, What??? A SEX BOOK?"
Me: Yes, Isla. I remember. Keep your voice down. Grandma doesn't hear very well. That's why she says crazy shit sometimes.
Isla: It was so funny. A sex book!!! You remember that?...
Me: Peanut, when your mom gives you a glare like that, you tend to remember.
Isla: Can we get this kit to make Pom Pom puppies?
Me: Uhm, no. It has yarn and stuff and you have to make the actual pom poms, and Mommy doesn't do very well with that stuff...crafts in general, really not my thing...oh look! A TOY!!!
Isla: I really want this. We can do it, Mommy! I know we can.

Flash forward to this monstrosity.

I'm not going to tell you how long this took me. At some point during the construction of this beady-eyed beauty, I muttered, "I'd rather be in hell." Isla asked me, "Is that an expression, Mommy?" No, Peanut. In this case, it's not an expression. I'd really rather be in hell. After the finishing touches including the tongue placement, I told her that her dog sort of looked like an owl. That was dying. She says she loves him. So of course I do, too.

I'm going to call my mom and tell her that I did crafts - she'll never believe me. If you squint (really hard), it sort of does resemble the creature on the front of the box.

Holy terrors.

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