Nothing says I Love You, like...

I asked Isla to sign a card for Daddy. Hands-to-face in horror, she wailed: "WHY, IS HE DYING?" No, Isla. We're just writing out a card for Valentine's Day. Oh. That crisis averted, I also asked her to write down what Jimmy wanted to say. His new thing whenever he sees his Dad is to shout: "RODDY, MY MAN!!!" And apparently that is exactly what he wanted to say this Valentine's Day. Also of note, as per his signature, I'm guessing his new east Indian name is "Jamal."

Oh, and please Jack...in lieu of flowers, please draw a cock and ball set. Nothing screams love more than that.

Queens in the North are born in September, you say? Why, yes...yes they are. Other than celebrate the birth of our Lord, what the hell else were our parents meant to do in December?