Sunday, February 19, 2017

Sorry for being a dick...

I am blessed with a little girl who knows a thing or two about issuing the perfect apology. First of all, she ensures the intended audience is aware of the intent of said card by titling it: "Sorry Note", complete with beautiful imagery. Then inside, a heartfelt: "Sorry for being a dick", which I think we can all agree is the perfect blend of truth and humour to cancel out most transgressions. Hallmark, you getting this? And as my one friend pointed out, she may have indeed wrote: Sorry for "you" being a dick, then stroked it, hence also issuing one last subtle reminder that neither one of us was acting very nicely. A final punch packaged with a heart. Fucking brilliant, really...the card that keeps on giving.

Shortly after delivering my apology note, she starting ...showing off a bit with the following:

Isla: May I please clean my room before we go watch a movie?
Me: Are you ill?
Isla: No, I'm not sick. I just used my conscience. That's the virtue I am using.
Me: Seriously. Are you dying?
Isla: It is really hard to use this virtue.
Me: *desperately searching for phone to dial 911*

I just love her. I think she's pure magic.


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